網友Andy在他的blog一篇Dying中提出兩個問題:1) Do you want to know when you are going to die?
2) If you know you are going to die at a certain date, would you tell others about it, especially those who are close to you, like your husband/wife?
我作了以下回應:
1/ no (unless i am dying young, i do want to know... so that i don't have to save up money and will travel much more! :P)
2/ no... but if i knew, it's hard not to tell my loved ones... hmm.
andy: i know they love me even though they don't say it in words.
我真的不願意知道自己哪一天返天家, 相信很少人會想知道. 但假如我很早便去世, 我倒有點想知道, 好讓我可以多一點享受人生, 不用儲蓄或節儉, 再多點旅遊, 再多點利用時間與家人享受生活. 我們天天工作那麼辛苦, 有假期也不敢太花費, 都是為了供樓為了退休, 如果我知道根本活不到退休之年, 我想, 我真的希望可以活得更開心. 當然, 這種享樂主意不太值得推崇, 但人之常情吧.
至於如果知道自己的死期, 會否告訴親人, 尤其是自己的另一半, 我都選擇不說. 不過這個確實有點難度, 就如假若患了重病不告訴家人自己一個人獨自承受一樣悽涼. 若果只是死期而不是患病, 告訴了他們, 大家都不好過. Andy說讓家人知道, 可以讓他們有機會對自己表達怎樣愛自己, 又給自己機會對他們表達愛. 雖然如果我是"United 93"及那班航機的乘客, 我必定會打電話給至親道別, 但如果只是知道若干年後某一天會離世, 我真希望可以等待到當天才讓他們知道, 又或之前把想說的話寫在信上. 其實不用家人及至親說出來, 自己也十分清楚他們愛自己, 一切如常不是更好嗎?
10 comments:
If you know you only have 3 months to live, would you tell your loved ones?
hmm... maybe i'll wait til the last few weeks...
Put the question in another way: If your loved ones are going to die in 3 months, do you want to know? Or you would like him/her to tell you when it reaches the last few weeks?
it really depends on him/her. very often, we don't have the choice. i am so familiar with sudden death.
1) No
2) No
You didn't answer the question. The Q is: would you like to know it if your love ones are going to die in 3 months?
I suppose you can answer "I don't care and it depends on him". But I am sure this is not your answer, is it?
My answer to both questions is yes.
Andy: Don't push if someone don't want to face such question, or don't have the same answer as yours.
andy: ok, if my loved ones are going to die in 3 months... i might want to know, but that 3 months will be like hell. it will be too scared to face. if the death cannot be prevented (e.g. sickness), i don't want to know, but if the death can be prevented (e.g. suicide or accident (which in this question it might be foreseen right?)) then i do want to know and not going to let it happen.
Sorry that I might have sounded a little pushy when asking the question, but I was certainly not expecting some answers or expect others to have the same answers as mine.
no no, it's fine. :) i don't feel u pushy, just that we have diff views.
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